Ok, so I was in the office this afternoon and the phone rang . . . I didn’t recognize the name / number on the Caller ID, and went against my better judgement and answered it anyway . . .

Me:     “Mobitech – this is Chad:”

Caller:     “Can you FTP?”

M:    “I’m sorry, could you repeat that?”

C:    “Can you FTP?”

I’m sitting there on the phone trying to determine if this is a prank call, or someone who really doesn’t grasp technology . . .   Come to find out, they really didn’t grasp technology.  They were (supposedly) trying to upload a file to “a company” (trying to get specifics was like pulling teeth – I finally gave up trying to get any additional info).  He needed to get this file uploaded as soon as possible, he had never used FTP before and it was JUST TAKING TOO LONG!!!!    

M:   “Ok, what type of internet connection do you have?”

C:   “AOL”   (of freakin’ course)

M:   “Ok, is it a high-speed connection like cable or DSL, or do you use a modem to dial-up?”

C:   “I use my modem.  My computer is pretty old – I think my modem is a 33-something”

M:   “Do you know how big the file you are trying to upload is?”

C:   “Yeah – 196 MB”

Yes, ladies and gentlement – that is right.  This poor caller was trying to upload a 196 MB file via a dial-up connection to AO-HELL with a 33.6 modem . . .   Let that sink in . . . Wow.   No wonder it was taking too long!!!

That folks, is why you don’t answer the office phone on a Saturday afternoon . . .  especially when you have voicemail and your critical customers have your cell phone number if it’s an emergency . . .